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“THOSE WHO TRY, FALL. BUT THOSE WHO QUIT, FAIL.” - Bolaji Oyejide.

I came up with this quote (YES, my own quote, I’ve made it now!) in December 2010.

During a particularly trying time with my work.

Things just were not going my way.

And yet, I’ve always been a big believer in the HERO persona that we all have as part of our character.

Some keep it latent. Hidden. Buried.

Others let it shine.

The thing is – the arc of the hero’s story is never one that goes from natural talent, to overcoming the impossible challenge on the first try.

Instead, it usually goes through a long period of character-building.

Several difficult hurdles, increasing in difficulty each time.

Several stumbles and falls along the way.

But our hero is a hero because (s)he keeps trucking on.

(S)he moves forward where most of us would turn back.

Our hero has talent, true indeed.

This often leads the hero to be overly self-assured -  at least in the domain of their talent.  At the beginning of their journey.

It allows them to fail magnificently.

Have You Ever Failed Magnificently?

I have.

I’m talking trying something that you should have succeeded in…

And failing.

In public.

I wrote a story about my fear of failure as a 14-year old athlete… leading to my most embarrassing public performance ever.

Can you imagine crossing the finish line of a 400-meter race
Dead last (by a significant margin),

Tears welling,
Head bowed,
As every girl in school looks on?

You’ll have to hear this story to believe it…
But I’ll get back to that in a minute.

This relates to you directly, though.

This relates to your challenge.

• Maybe you’ve faltered in your efforts.
• Maybe you never got started.
• And maybe, that’s justification to just stop trying.

“I’ll do the challenge again next time”, you tell yourself.

“I never really had the time to do it this time”, you tell yourself.

THIS IS NOT ALL OR NOTHING.

You don’t get penalized for doing the challenge only
6 days out of 7. Or only 5 out of 7. Or even 3 out of 7.

Even doing it ONE DAY OUT OF SEVEN gets you miles ahead
of where you would be without the challenge.

WHY?

Because you tried.

You risked failure.  In public.

I give everyone who signed up for this public challenge
infinite credit.

There are MANY people who, like us, suffer from Procrastinitis.

Who would benefit IMMENSELY from a challenge such as this.

Who WANTED to sign up, but couldn’t risk failing publicly.

Those Who Try, Fall.

You will fall, if you try.

Maybe not on Day 1.

Maybe not on Day 2.

Maybe it’s on Day 11.  or Day 20.

But failure is in the cards for you.  I guarantee it.

If you have no possible chance of failure, you might as well be in a straitjacket.  Or worse.

So if failure is guaranteed, multiple times along our path, why do we work so hard to avoid it?

Because our brains are wired to protect us from pain.

The fight or flight instinct, that make us react to all unfamiliar pain as if it threatens our very existence.

Yeah.  That instinct.  (Some call it “The Lizard Brain”.)

But there is no Scarlet Letter for having the most failures. Thomas Edison failed over 10,000 times, on his path to discovering electricity, and umpteen inventions.

Only his perspective on failure allowed him to fall down, get up, stand up, figure out why he fell, and resolve to not fall in that particular manner any more.

The fear of failure.  A good friend of mine in the past. One I’ve done a better job of distancing myself from, as I try and fail more often.  Although it rears it’s ugly head whenever I venture too far from my comfort zone.

Those Who Quit, Fail.

If you don’t risk failure, you will (probably) avoid public failure, embarrassment, and ridicule.

You will also subscribe to a life of mediocrity.

You will imprison yourself in a self-assigned “comfort zone”.

The comfort zone is only comfortable because you’ve shrunk yourself enough to fit in it.

(Hang on, is that another quotable quote?  OH SNAP! June 9th, 2011! You heard it here first, folks!)

Hm.  I think I’ve gotten to meddling, now.

The comfort zone is only comfortable because you’ve shrunk yourself enough to fit in it.

This is hitting close to home, now.

Tough.

Someone had to say it.

You are way more incredible than your actions give you credit for.  All because you’ve chosen to take permanent residence in your comfort zone.

Don’t think I’m throwing stones in my glass comfort zone house… I’m as guilty as the next person.

But I acknowledge that. So whenever I’m tempted to QUIT because of the fear of failure, or the pain of trying…

I find ways to shake the fear off.

Willpower doesn’t always work.  In fact, it often fails.

But systems work pretty consistently.

This entire challenge is a SYSTEM.
An external source of structure and discipline to augment your internal structure and discipline.  While you build that internal discipline for this particular type of task.

Systems work.

Find a system that works to help you conquer the fear of the unfamiliar.

And ride that system into the ground.  Or the sunset . Either way, keep riding.

BUT BACK TO MY STORY OF TEENAGE FAILURE!

Here’s my story of the fear of failure, and the public ridicule that ensued.

http://www.whoisbolaji.com/video-the-fear-of-failure

Today is your opportunity to get back in the game.

Take on your challenge today.

Tackle the fear of failure.  And get used to that feeling.

Life outside the comfort zone is full of growth moments
like this one.

It hurts.  And it’s also worth it.

Now let’s go throw stones in our own comfort zone mansion.

And have a break out performance today.

TESTIMONIALS FROM DAY 3:

Maegan Prentice 2:06 am

Gotta say a big thanks. I have agonized over deciding on a publisher for forever it seems (really about 3 months) and now after three days of focusing an hour a day on nothing else, no distracting links, no allowing myself to get off topic, and the answer I was searching for just showed up. I narrowed down to two publishers, found the exact info I was looking for and VOILA!

Decision made, I’m going on to the next publishing step after my original goal for the 7 days – how best to go about putting my book into ebook form. Anyone have any good links to research formats and distribution. This is not a how to book. It a narrative non-fiction for an audience of people in the fields of multicultural studies, peace studies, English as a second language….

Dare Vuvuzela Kumolu-Johnson 12:22 am

Just finished spending another set of hours editing pictures with barely any distraction during the hours. Will continue tomorrow! Been tasking but fulfilling at the same time.

Raquel Robinson Jun 8

day 3, finished up two of six chapters, very excited, still no coffee and I must admit I miss it:(…but my mind is in drive mode and i am implementing a lot of good things for my family, it’s funny how one good thing can trigger so many more!!! good night i am SOOOOO tired.

HOUSEKEEPING:

• Day 1: Eye of the Tiger http://www.whoisbolaji.com/nocrastinator-challenge-day-1
• Day 2: Protect Your Dreams http://www.whoisbolaji.com/nocrastinator-challenge-day2
• Day 3: An Excuse to Die For http://www.whoisbolaji.com/excuses
• How to Earn Points: http://www.whoisbolaji.com/nocrastinator-join
• Who’s Winning? http://www.whoisbolaji.com/nocrastinator-whos-playing
• Post your daily progress here:http://www.WhoIsBolaji.com/7days

QUOTE(S) OF THE DAY:

“Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs
even though checkered by failure, than to rank with those timid
spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much because they live in the
gray twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat.”
– Theodore Roosevelt.

“The comfort zone is only comfortable because you’ve shrunk yourself
enough to fit in it.”
– Bolaji Oyejide.

“Those who try, fall.  But those who quit, fail.”
– Bolaji Oyejide. 

Go out today and FALL with gusto.

Note: As soon as this blog post gets 10 comments, I’m going to disable comments.

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